Housing Fiasco

Hey there! Just wanted to touch a little bit about the current housing issue. Having recently been in a very comfortable situation, I was relaxed and not worried about a roof over my head. You get comfy and secure in knowing that you have everything together. I mean, for the first time in my entire life I have lived at one address for just shy of 9 years, and believe me, it is a shock to think about it still. I do believe at last count I had roughly 50 different addresses over the course of my decades on Earth thus far. We do not have it bad here, the house is far from perfect, the neighborhood has it's entertaining moments, but the location and convenience and price are right. All in one swooping moment, chaos swept in a suddenly we were faced with having to find a new place to reside. Piece of cake right? Wrong! Forgetting that this country is in the throes of a huge financial crisis which is affecting jobs, housing, food, gas and everything else that you can think of. I dove head first into house hunting. And, let me tell you, I got a headache. Stress became the norm for me everyday. As the time grew shorter and my deadline was looming, my money was dwindling from paying for application fees deemed fair by greedy brokerage firms. They make money off of every application submitted and the fee is per applicant. Let us not forget the same lofty standards set by these companies that demand that your credit score be over 650, again per applicant as well as making 3 times the rental price. Now in todays' market, that is an averagerental price of $1900 per month, your monthly income has to be at least $5700. Get the hell out of here with that BS! I know people who have great jobs and do not make that kind of money. And here we are in the great state of Arizona where the cost of living does not raise to meet higher cost of living standards and do not forget that inflation rate in Arizona is than other states. Everything has gone up at an average of 1% monthly. Gone are the days of being able to talk to a homeowner and rent a place. Gone are the days of going into a rental community and filling out a reasonable application. What are we to do? Where do you go when faced with this? There are no easy answers and there are no easy solutions. On a personal level, I had of course the nagging thoughts that we would have to move in with someone, thusly splitting up the household. I had nagging thoughts of having to move so far away that all things including employment would be in question. I am sure that so many people are facing this situation. I am sure that so many people cannot afford to move. I am sure that is why the homeless community has become even more critical. I am sure that is why many now resort to living in their vehicles. I am sure that is why we are now allowing tent cities to pop up in Phoenix. I am sure that is why we are in a crisis that seems undending. What can be done? What can we do? I personally am waiting to see the market crash. I personally am waiting to see more desperate times. I personally am praying for the break that everyone so deserves. I am fortunate that I am no longer stressed about looking for a place, I now have a year to focus on that move. I am prepared now, this I know. So many others are not as fortunate and are desperately searching for a place to call their own, a roof over their heads and food in their bellies. Please keep everyone out there in desperation in your thoughts and prayers. Please be kind, you never know how close someone is to a breaking point. Please be a little more patient and be a little more understanding. If you see someone struggling, ask them if they are hungry, if they need water, if they need a list of community resources. A little goes a long way. One last note, remember to be grateful for what you have, you never know when it could be taken away from you. Remember to keep kindness in your heart. Remember to be focused and keep striving for your betterment. Thanks for listening. I leave you with peace and love always Ti

The Old Lady in the Blue House

This is storytime...... On my drive home from work, I most days would avoid the freeway and just take surface streets home. This started years ago when I realized that I spent the same amount of time traveling either way, but with less stress. On Thomas Road, I would pass by a little blue house on the corner. More times than none, I would catch the light and have to sit there at the red light. At least 3 days out of the 5, there would be an elderly woman outside. She walked with a hunch. She pushed around her wheelchair in her tiny yard. Her beautiful white hair was usually messed up and falling into her face. She always wore sweat shorts, a tank top two sizes too big and sandals, no matter the weather. I was captivated by her. Many times I wanted to stop, park and go have a conversation with her. She looked like she had many stories residing within the confines of her mind. I do not know why I never did, maybe I just wanted this to remain a fascination and not a fact...make sense? The house is a little one, intricate wooden shutters with hand carved swirls. Fake snow still clinging to the windows from a Christmas past. In the carport, her gardening tools were stacked neatly on one wall. Her yard was beautiful. You could tell by just looking at her walk gingerly through the yard, that she cared for it all by herself. Her yard was a beautiful mix of various cacti, roses, two beautiful treea and rock walls in different designs painted the same color blue as the house. I would catch her trimming the tree, watering the plants and shuffling around with her potting soil and other garden gadgets on her wheelchair. I imagined many stories in my mind. Was she married? If she is, is her husband inside that tiny little house watching TV? Does she have grand children? The storyteller in me already has a story visualized in my mind of course. There were days when I would not see her and I would get a little lump in my throat, hoping that all was well for her. I found a great comfort in seeing her and I also looked forward to catching the red light, it made me smile. So, I changed jobs briefly and did not see the lady in the blue house for quite some time. Luckily, the job only lasted briefly and I was once again free to drive my "normal" route home. One day, something changed. Something was off. I noticed that her tools were no longer in the carport, on one occasion. On another occasion, I noticed that her wheelchair was gone. Thoughts raced through my mind.....I was sad. Then, I noticed that her lovely little yard was drying out and unkept. I had a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. I never did see her again, my mind raced with scenarios...none of which made me feel comforted. Next time that I drove by her house, there were strangers in her carport and a dumpster in the front yard. Well, my heart sank. Of course this could have been her family, but I still felt like they had violated her space. This week it just so happens that there has been a turn in the story. I pulled up to the red light and gasped. Her lovely trees had been ripped out of the ground and thrown in a dumpster! Her roses were gone! But the sight that hit me in the heart and brought a tear to my eye was this, they crushed her rock walls with the same mini Bobcat that had destroyed the rest of the yard. My heart hurt seeing the piles of crushed blue rocks covered in dirt and left in piles. Discarded like trash. Crumbled memories. I had held out hope that if that was her family, they would have kept the quaint little yard with the bench under the shade of the larger tree. But alas, I do believe that the beautiful little blue house will get a facelift for a more "modern" look to keep the neighborhood looking some sort of way. I know this is a sad story but it is one that I felt the need to share. It also reminds me that I was able to share peaceful moments thanks to the little old lady in the little blue house. Thank you dear stranger for bringing many smiles to my face, thank you for helping me have a creative story to tell today and thank you for allowing a glimpse into your world. I wish you peace and beauty wherever it is that you may be. Thank you for listening to my stories. Remember to always be thankful for the little things in this life that others so frequently ignore. I leave you with peace, love and light.

Memories in Music

Well hello again! It has been a minute has it not?? We have had a couple of crazy years for sure. Things have happened that I never imagined seeing in my lifetime yet alone the lifetimes of my children....but hey, here we are. Still perservering. Thankful for every day that welcomes me. I wanted to do a little walk down memory lane. My memory gets fuzzy somedays but others it is pretty good and these are great memories so why not share them? My first concert (that I willingly went to) was in my 8th grade year in Philadelphia, PA. It was Twisted Sister with Joan Jett and The Blackhearts opening the show. My step sister Jamie and I were gifted the tickets for our birthdays. I remember getting ready in our attic bedroom....two giggly teens playing with colored hairspray, glitter and makeup (rare, as my Dad did not allow me to wear that) We wore jeans and oversize shirts and teased out short hair as high as we could. I remember being so nervous on the way and my Dad kept telling us how to be safe in the big city of Philly ( he was dropping us off and going to do journalist stuff while we had the concert). He took us to the Rocky steps as well so it was way cool. We got into the stadium and went to the merch table, we bought the tour books, pins and a bumper sticker. With dreams of meeting the band, we made our way to the seats. I was overcome with excitement! It was huge and jam packed with people. We giggled and jumped up and down in anticipation. Soon, the lights dimmed and my first girl crush stepped out onto the stage....she belted out "I Love Rock n' Roll" and I was screaming along with a sea of other voices. By the time they finished their set...I was already deaf and hoarse. The band bowed and Joan Jett exited the stage. I sat eagerly awaiting Twisted Sister and anticipating a glimpse of Eddie "Fingers" Ojeda (my band member crush at the time). Lights dimmed, neon lights flashed across the stage and all you heard was the magical scream of Dee Snider blast through the building. We all screamed, I cried and we jumped up and down. All you saw was a sea of fists raised into the air, pumping along to the music. He egged the crowd on, having us participate with the song. I was crying from excitement...this was the most fun that I had ever had in my young life. This was 1984, prime time to be experiencing hair bands. The concert went on, my step sister and I kept saying how amazing this was and that we were grown now haha. The concert came to an end, they did an encore for the roaring crowd and we then had to make our way in a sea of people to find my Dad who was waiting somewhere on the street. We went outside into the chilly winter night. Looking everywhere for my Dad, I did not see him and had a moment of panic. Two little girls in a big city, scary times. Finally I heard my name and turned around and there was my Dad. We got in and he asked us all about it. We were giddy and giggly and excited teenage girls, he actually humored us (this was rare). When we got home, we cleaned up and went to bed. We stayed up all night talking about this concert, this was really a moment of bonding for us as we rarely got along. I can still remeber the feeling of each moment of that night, still makes me smile. This concert fueled quite an obsession for me in regards to concert going (and hair bands haha). No concert is quite as memorable as your first. I have been to so many. At one point I had all of my concert tickets stubs, tour books, pins and t shirts from each of my concerts. Sadly a storage unit mishap with a disgruntled idiot took those memories, but the ones imbedded in my brain are permanently lodged in the nooks and crannies of days gone by. Let's see......I think now I will do a quick run down of the ones that I went to. I am proud to say that I was able to see all of the great hair bands in the 80's and some very cool notable shows sprinkled throughout the 90's and into the 2000's. Some of these bands played together but I could not for the life of me remember the order so you get a list. There is no order to these concerts as they are sprinkled throughout my life thus far, so here I go....let's see how many of you went to see any of these shows. Twisted Sister w/ Joan Jett and The Blackhearts Bon Jovi Cinderella AC/DC Warrant Great White Tesla Motely Crue (the spinning drum set one) w/ Whitesnake, Poison, Jet Boy Poison Dokken Robert Plant Jimmy Page (w/ Jason Bonham on drums) Scorpions (most memorable concert while being under the influence) Tesla Aerosmith (Dream On still holds different meaning to me to this day) Red Hot Chili Peppers (after Kiedis cut the hair...sad day in fan history lol) Marc Anthony (long hair and karate chop moves on stage.....we are talking 1995 maybe?) ZZ Top (thanks to some great dudes, I was able to fulfill a lifelong dream to hear TUSH live) All American Rejects (helps to be a parent of a teenage girl) Fallout Boy (again, pays to be a parent of a teenage girl) Old School Jam which included Rose Royce, Zapp and Cameo to name a few (I was gifted these tickets by 104.3 radio on Mothers Day) Evanescence (more specifically Amy Lee with an orchestra- one of the best moments in concert going for me) Brother Ali (another dream of mine, gifted to me by a person with whom I was once very close to). There may be some that I have missed as the 80's could be a blur sometimes. There are numerous outdoor concerts that I have been to that I could not tell you who it was that I saw before they became famous. The concerts have all shaped me and gave me a different love of music. Some hitting me so hard that now when I hear a familiar song it hits me in my gut. I do have some concerts that I missed out on (and kick myself pretty hard now) or that I should have gone to when offered the opportunity (I was to chicken shit to follow through on the plans) Prince was a coulda shoulda woulda, Beastie Boys, Digital Underground (before they were a household name), David Bowie, Red Hot Chili Peppers (when they were a up and coming band, playing at a dive bar in San Francisco), Metallica, George Clinton, Erykah Badu, Jill Scott, Boys To Men....soooooo many to speak of, sadly. I will say that the memories of these shows are cherished and I hold them all near to my heart. I still remember who I went with, what I wore, where I was, and of course there are some crazy ass stories that go along with each and every single show. I was a bit of a wild child. Those moments are what make me glad that I grew up when I did and that we did not have cell phones or social media, my quiet, good girl facade would have surely been exposed. Concerts were a chance for me to come out of my shell and let loose from my normal icy exterior. Thank you for going down this memory lane with me. I hope it made you chuckle. If you were with me at one of those shows, I hope it gave you some good memories. I hope it made you reflect on the shows that you have gone to. We all need great memories to reflect on, it can bring a smile to your face when you least expect it. Here is to future music shows, the people that you share them moment with and to all the musicians out there bringing the joy to all of us! Until next time....thank you for reading and I will be sharing more random memories soon. Peace, Love, Unity and Happiness

"An Act of Treason" Episode 6 on "The United States of America"

Yesterday I witnessed something that I never thought that I would see in my lifetime. An act of treason. Do not get me wrong, I am all for protesting the inner workings of our government and its lopsided policies. I am all for standing up for what you believe in. I am all for sticking it to the government that so easily sticks it to us. Yesterday on the daily melodramatic episode of "The United States of America" we saw in full color what white privilege is, not that we have never seen it before mind you....but this episode took the cake. We had thousands storm the Capital Building. They trampled through barricades that were not fully protected by Capital police. They stormed through the Capital building, which is usually dripping in security, that some say is impenetrable. They stormed through offices of our lawmakers. They destroyed property, they broke windows, they threw pepper spray, they proudly raised their flags that signify their hatred, they took selfies with the law enforcement that not too long ago were guarding the building (and very curiously were stated to not have enough of), they rallied together as one agitated mass over an election that they think was stolen from their president (the very president who is an actor). An election that signified the need for change and people rose to the occasion through adversity and a pandemic to make a path for those changes. How can you not look at this in any other way than privilege? Look at all of the violence commited by law enforcement during PEACEFUL protests over the course of history, most noteably within the last 12 months. If this were a crowd of Black Lives Matter protesters, Water Defenders or Environment protectors there would have been murders, beatings, torture in vehicles with tinted windows, arrests...and I guarantee that no one would have taken a selfie in the speaker’s office. Do you believe that there would have only been four deaths? Do you believe that they would have been shorthanded with law enforcement? Do you think that the law enforcement would have stopped to take a selfie with a protester? Do you believe that there would have been nothing short of a massacre? The state of our Country has been under hostile leadership for 4 years, leadership that has been shaped and formed to honor those that support that leadership. If you do not adhere to those leaders policies, you are suddenly out of work and deemed crazy or anti American. The state of this Country has been a mess for as long as I can remember so again, this is not a new issue. All of the proof is with the families that are mourning those that lives were taken from them for standing up for themselves and for others. All of the proof is evident by people of color who have lost their lives minding their own business. All of the proof is evident in how very lopsided the justice system is. All of the proof is evident in the laws that were written that protect the people who stormed the Capital. All of the proof is evident by the (pre-approved) photographs gracing the pages of those popular magazines and newspapers and media outlets for all of us to see. All of the proof is in our faces. This is nothing new. This country was formed in violence, prejudice, hatred and seperation of class. This country was formed in blood of the lives that they took to gain control of others that they saw as different. So yes, in a way we are not shocked. We now should take steps to change. We now should take steps to accept. We now should take steps to heal. I have so much more to say however, I am at a loss for words since there are millions of them floating around in this mind of mine.

A Dog's Life, In Memory Of Bonkers

You came into our world 11/19/2006 from the County Animal Shelter with no idea of what your story was. You left our world 5/24/2020 in your living room with a story to leave behind.
I am healing from the pain of a loss that I never have felt in my life. A loss that rocked me to my core.
I am constantly reminded of you as I have social media memories that pop up daily. I have your ashes on my shelf and have one of your favorite babies on my shelf. Lovely people that you made friends with have created art and you even have a pin,a magnet and sticker now! You taught lessons, you created peace, you made us laugh and you made us cry.
I miss you more than words will ever be able to express but I am so full of love and great memories of you. A great friend of yours named Moes felt pressure to make a drawing of you that served your memory well. Chuck and James painted a mural of your beautiful face. Pedro has a Bonkers shelf. Bri wrote a lovely memory. Jason even made you into one of his famous uni cycles. You touched so many of us and we are eternally grateful for the gift of your friendship and undying love.
Thank you for being a wonderful friend, a healer, a comedian and for keeping us on our toes for all of the years that we had you. I am eternally grateful that I looked in your eyes all of those years ago and decided that you needed to be saved, you in turn saved me. I love you big dog....may you be eternally happy and digging holes, running free and munching on treats.
Thank you to everyone who has immortalized him in some way and who will contribute to the book that will be written (this is taking time since every time I write, I have to wipe away tears which is pretty hard to write seeing through those). I appreciate each and every one of you more than you know

The Human Connection

I wanted to share a few stories with you. They are both true stories. And I want to make it known now,that self glorification, kudos or "look at me" is not the goal with these stories. The goal is to share a human experience and how important human connections are.
The first one will be The Story of Robert and his Dog. The second will be the story of Chad.

The story of Robert and his Dog. I met Robert along the underpass on Van Buren Street while waiting for the light to turn green. He had no sign, he had no sad look on his face. He had a scruffy face, dirty clothes and a scruffy pup. He had a smile. I handed him some change and a bottle of water. He said thank you with a smile on his face and a twinkle in his eyes. I waved as I pulled away. I would see Robert on the side of the road or by the corner 7eleven pulling his pup in the wagon behind his bicycle. Every chance I got I would give him some change or a bottle water. He is full of gratitude and a smile every time that we cross paths. I became worried for a bit when time passed and I had not seen him. One morning on my way to work I spotted him in the laundromat parking lot. I quickly pulled in and rolled my window down. I said "good morning Robert, I have been looking for you" and his reply was " uh oh, so is everyone" and he laughed the biggest belly laugh and made me laugh as well. I asked him how he had been and how his dog was. He told me that he had recently had a fall and had to go to the hospital for a week and luckily someone was able to look after his companion. He told me his story and how he has had the dog since he was a puppy. Not once did he ask me for anything. We just shared a great conversation. In parting, I gave him my lunch, a few bucks and some water. We exchanged names again and he thanked me multiple times. I pulled out of the parking lot feeling full of gratitude for this life that I live. I still come across Robert and his Dog frequently. One evening I saw him on my way to the grocery store. I asked him where he would be hanging out and he told me exactly where. He has his spots timed out so as to avoid trouble or harassment or cops. I went to the store and bought him a sandwich, fruit, crackers, a gallon of water and some dog food. When I pulled up alongside him and told him that I had some stuff for him, his eyes lit up. He smiled and thanked me a million times. He waved to my daughter and thanked her as well. Now every time that I see him, he waves and that makes me happy and feeling fortunate.

I recently met Chad on the Alma School Road off ramp. I was four lanes away from him and the light turned green. I felt compelled to give him something, anything. That morning I had packed myself a snack of watermelon and water. I drove 3 blocks to jump back onto the freeway and get off at the exit on his side of the street. When I stopped at the red light I noticed his sign. It said "Hello, I am Chad and I am homeless and a little hungry"
I called his name and said "hello Chad, my name is Tianne. I have some food and water for you if that would be alright?" He stood up and walked over to my van. He was unshaven and wrinkled from age and sun and he had a huge smile! I gave him my watermelon, a fork, some water and a few bucks. He talked to me for a minute and then my light turned green. I wished him safety and relief from the Arizona sun. He waved and yelled out "God bless you young lady". Tears flowed from my eyes as I turned the corner. Tears of gratitude.

I believe in the human connection. I believe in humanity. I believe that "whatever is hurtful to you, do not do that to any person"
I believe in being kind. I believe in treating people with respect and dignity until proven otherwise.

I choose to do what little that I can for those less fortunate because we could all find ourselves in a similar situation. I believe that a smile will brighten most peoples day.

I just wanted to share these stories with you. Again, I am not looking for praise. I wanted to share the stories since I did not feel that they were stories to be held in.

Please remember that not all people that you encounter on the side of the road are hustlers, or druggies. Please remember that we all are looking for love, acceptance, connections and life.

I leave you with peace, love and gratitude.

Just a Short Note

It has been awhile and boy has a lot happened within just a short time frame.

Let me just begin by saying that the current year 2020 has been one hell of a roller coaster indeed.

Where do I begin? First of all we still have children in cages and camps. Raging wildfires in two of the Worlds largest ecosystems, deadly flooding, Volcanic eruption, Earthquakes in areas that have not had one in at least a hundred years....oh and yes, we still have children in cages. Ongoing police brutality, never ending racism and still, children in cages. We have had locust swarms in biblical proportions, never ending war, religion scandals, riots and ongoing police brutality. Oh, and let us not forget an ongoing pandemic, sure to rear its head again and again. Mass incarceration and children in cages. Murder by the hands of the righteous and entitled. The death of legendary human beings. Plane crashes. Riots and protests.

An uprising. A change is coming. We are beginning to open our eyes wider. We are starting to come together en mass. We are starting to speak up, speak out and use our voices in creative ways.

We must come together! We must continue to fight for our fellow man/woman/child. We must rise up and embrace one another and celebrate one another. The time of division has to come to an end. We must unite as one people. We must be a voice for voiceless! We must yell, write, protest, vote!