Popularity Rant

Lately, this has been invading my mind and I see no other way out of it other than to throw it out into the universe. Maybe it is the creative market being invaded by people who have no soul, no passion or love for what they are creating. Maybe it is my impending 30 year class reunion. Or maybe it is people who come out of the woodwork who never gave a fuck about me, trying to give a fuck now. Maybe it is fake ass people flooding social media.
I believe that I may have written about this before but always nice to revisit those issues that still gnaw away at people...it's me, I am people
The popularity syndrome is as old as time ( I believe anyway) and it has never faltered. Each decade, each generation has had their own form of it
It seems more rampant now since technology has brought forth the monster known as social media, the demon that we all love to hate
I have always hated the concept of popularity yet I always wanted to be accepted. I despised the "popular" kids just as they despised me (the misfit)
Now, do not get me wrong I had some great friends and I got along with everyone. I was not confrontational and I was sweet. I was a pushover and tried so hard to be cool but yet, still stay weird. It was a weird internal battle that always raged within me. I was weird and I embraced it, I actually never thought that there was anything wrong with me until I got to middle school. 7th grade changed my mind about people 100%
See, I was a product of a divorced home so I shuttled back and forth between parents. That took on a whole new level of chaos when my Dad moved to Pennsylvania. I had to leave my hometown and my dear friends behind. I was to spend my 7th grade year with him. I go to the Junior High there and they give me an academic test before enrolling me. After my testing they tell me that I am in the top percentile. I am like "uhm okay, can I just get this school thing over with" (Remember, I am now the dreaded new kid)
So in this school they divide kids based on their test scores. We had 7 sections of a seventh grade class, broken down like 7-1, 7-2 and so on. So, 7-1 and 7-2 were the cream of the crop, 7-3 through 7-5 were high to mid range, 7-6 and 7-7 were the "troubled kids" or learning impaired kids.
I was kind of in a shock, where I went to school in California we just went to school man, we all learned and those of us who could not grasp it, got tutoring or one on one time with a teacher or teachers aide. My 12 year old brain was trying to grasp this concept even after school began. I tested above average so I was put in the mid high range. And here was to be my first lessons in popularity.
I was in the "goody two shoes" group (as people so lovingly called us) however, I did not quite fit in. See, I was poor so I was not like "them" and they made sure that I knew it. They did not talk to me as we sat at our segregated lunch tables. We had to sit within our numbered groups. My fellow classmates were not very friendly, with me anyway. They ignored me and looked at me like I had a disease. It was lonely at that table.If we had friends in other groups (which I did), we were not allowed to sit with them.....tell me the logic in that.
Longest story short, this was my first lesson in not belonging or in not being popular enough to be around or even speak to certain people.
Now, I get back into my current popularity theme.
Being a poet, an artist, a musician or a creative leads us into another form of popularity. This is much like High School where you have the beautiful ones, the rich ones, the narcissistic ones, the humble ones, the viruses and the lot. Social media while it may be a necessary evil to some, can also do so much damage. We find ourselves in comparison mode many times "look how many likes they have, look how many followers they have, look at how perfect their lives are....and the list goes on. The bullies have snide remarks or degrading comments for others that they see below their standards. The insecure ones wallow in despair over not being good enough. The secure ones are looked at as trying to be all that....and again, the list goes on.
I have tried to fit in most of my life, tried to be cool, tried to be nice, tried to be mean, tried to be beautiful and popular. All that I ever wanted really was someone, anyone to accept me as I am. Weird, cold, funny, loving, sarcastic, creative, sappy, loud, unrefined and just plain Ti. The girl who just wanted to be something important in this big, wide World. To leave my mark and make an impression on the Universe. We all can say at one point, "if I knew then, what I know now I would have done so much better"
But you know what? I would not change it for the world. I grew up with so many different experiences, but they are my experiences. I was able to experience life on so many levels and it truly made me who I am today. I accept myself! I love myself! I am (dare I say) proud of myself! And I have left my mark on this world by bringing two amazing children into this world who are my best creation by far.
I guess the reason for this long winded( unapologetically long winded )rant is do not pay attention to the popular kids. Be you!
Be magnificently you! Create how you want, create what you want! Stop trying to be something or someone that you are not. Those that matter are paying attention and really, that is the best kind of attention. To hell with the naysayers! To hell with the "cool" kids! To hell with the "in" crowd! To hell with the people who tell you to try something different so you get accepted! Fuck that! Do it your way. In the end you may or may not make it big but you know what? You will make it on your terms, how you are meant to make it. Follow your dreams no matter what they tell you. And never, ever change who you are to conform to someone else's standards of greatness! Fuck that! Fuck them!

What Does Community Mean to You? I Can Tell You What It Means To Me

First let us begin with the definition of "Community"
The definition of community is: feeling of fellowship with others, as a result of sharing common attitudes, interests, and goals
What does community mean to you?
To me, I am not sure how to define community. But, I can tell you what it means to me.
Community to me is a common ground between many different people from all walks of life to provide and thrive in the most positive way possible. Now, this can be through art, music, events, volunteering, cooking, dancing, farmers markets, family yard sales, church events, care packages and so much more. I am part of a great community of people. We come from all walks of life, all backgrounds. We bond over a multitude of things, and introduce one another to things that some of us have limited knowledge on. I believe that this is what builds a strong community. Everyone brings something to the table and we are willing to teach each other and work together towards the bigger picture.
I have been blessed with having friends in many different areas and therefore it has opened me up to a whole new world. It has also given me many chances to be involved in events that I otherwise would have never been involved with.
I have artist friends that are sketch artists, painters, muralists, graffiti artists, digital artists, fine art students and so much more. I will give you a few examples of the art "community". Most recently, I attended an event thrown by Furious Styles Crew for their 25th Anniversary and a local group called Urban Soul. They put on a week long party that ended on the ASU campus in Tempe. There were dancers, artists, DJ's, spoken word, Zines and so much more! I was so impressed with people from all walks of life coming together for a positive, uplifting experience. The music kept everyone moving and grooving. The art was amazing and let me tell you, watching spray can art unfold at the hands of a talented artist is truly an amazing experience. I love to watch the fluid movement as the aerosol hits the canvas, I love to see the spray in the air as they test the tips, I love to watch the colors blend right before my eyes like magic. I hold these artists in such a high regard as they have amazing skills and vision and bring it together in harmony to paint a picture with so much meaning.
I have many friends who are DJ's. I am always in awe of their ability to flawlessly blend music from all different genres together in a marriage of sounds. I find myself getting lost within the melody and I begin to forget about all my worries. I hold them in such a high regard and love all of them for the different styles that they bring to the table.
I have writer friends that blow my mind with their word play abilities. I can be transformed into another world in one sentence. Some of them do spoken word and others just put pen to surface. Words excite me, they always have. The power in words is unmatched in my opinion. People do not realize the strength in words. What is spoken can never be taken back that it why we have must watch what we say and with what emotion. I can get lost in words like nothing else.
I have friends who work magic with food and drinks. The way that they make flavors blend together in a juice to make your taste buds scream out in joy. The way they blend herbs and fresh vegetables together for a sauce to top a street taco blows my mind. The ability to make a cupcake that melts in my mouth and seems like there is nothing sinful about it.
All of this means "community" to me.
I am proud of each and every one of the people in my world for chasing their dreams, showing up and putting in effort.People who come together from all walks of life to bring a smile to someones face. To strengthen our community one moment at a time. Maybe changing a life or two. I love you all, it is impossible for me to name everyone but those that know, know. Much appreciation and love to all of you. I leave you with a million pictures to see just a glimpse of the greatness that I am surrounded by.
I leave you with peace, love and happiness.