Tuesday, August 29, 2017
Thoughts for the day
In this world of "likes" we forget to "like" ourselves. We lose ourselves to the "oh, i have to check my post and see who liked it", "oh, i have to check my post and see how many people liked it". We lose our focus on what is real. We lose our focus on what is happening around us. We lose our focus on actual conversations with people. We rely on social media to provide us with love, acceptance, recognition, news, trends, food and much more. Please understand, I am NOT bashing as that would make me a hypocrite of which I am NOT. I am involved in many aspects of social media. I am simply stating an observation of mine. We get caught up in the narcissism of others. We tend to forget that there is a little narcissism in all of us and that cannot be denied, otherwise we would not buy into it. Again, I am not bashing because I AM guilty of participation. And I enjoy it. So, just making a statement since I see so much go wrong within it but I do also see so much go right within it. It is sad to see people pass judgement on others, relationships become strained, communication disappear, bickering, name calling, bashing and all around negativity. But on the other hand it is great to see diversity being embraced, people promoting their talents, people promoting community events, supporting local businesses. All of this is so much easier within the structure of social media and for those things I am proud to see and proud to partake. We should really be promoting positive and unity and community and family through it. These are my random thoughts. Thanks for hearing me out. Peace, love and happiness always!
Sunday, August 27, 2017
Strength and Beginnings
I will begin by adding a lovely poem that I recently wrote. This prose speaks to me in so many ways. I want to share it so that someone else may feel pride in strength and finding their voice. I will change things up every week as I get more into the multiple levels of fun that this blog will show you. I have many things that entertain me and regular living is very entertaining indeed. I hope that you enjoy this one. Thanks for looking! Peace, Love and Happiness...always
What signifies strength?
What do I see?
Strong is the woman
The woman who endures a trauma
That embedded itself deep into her mind
That infected her soul
Damaged her heart
Strong is the woman
Slowly beginning to find her self
Looking past the pain
Strong is the woman
Who values her self
Strong is the woman
Who stands up for her self
Who finds her voice
Strong is the woman
Who repairs herself
Who embraces herself
Who is beginning to love herself
Strong is the woman who lifts herself up
Strong is the woman who empowers herself
What signifies strength?
What do I see?
Strong is the woman
The woman who endures a trauma
That embedded itself deep into her mind
That infected her soul
Damaged her heart
Strong is the woman
Slowly beginning to find her self
Looking past the pain
Strong is the woman
Who values her self
Strong is the woman
Who stands up for her self
Who finds her voice
Strong is the woman
Who repairs herself
Who embraces herself
Who is beginning to love herself
Strong is the woman who lifts herself up
Strong is the woman who empowers herself
Tuesday, February 21, 2017
Melancholy Musings
Melancholy Musings
Please understand
The melancholy musings of a misfit girl
For it means not that I am in despair
It means to heal
Healing from within
Releasing negativity that binds one so easily
I hope that it may not just help me
But….that it speaks to someone else
Helping to guide them to positive light that is so hard to hold onto
Please understand
The melancholy musings of a misfit girl
For it means not that I am in despair
It means to heal
Healing from within
Releasing negativity that binds one so easily
I hope that it may not just help me
But….that it speaks to someone else
Helping to guide them to positive light that is so hard to hold onto
A Strange Love
It all began with a chance encounter. She was just an ordinary girl. He was a very expressive guy. They met downtown on a beautiful spring evening. They had bumped into each other, quite literally face to book in a bookstore. He was perusing a book penned by Hunter S Thompson, intrigued, she asked him why that particular choice. He then went into great detail about the man behind the prose as well as the complexities of many other artists and writers. She felt for the first time in her life a loss for words. She was an avid reader, with universal tastes but in this case she was learning something new. They continued in conversation for what seemed like hours, chatting like old friends. As she finally tore herself away from him, she left thinking that he was one of the most engaging men that she had ever had the pleasure of meeting. The question that she soon asked herself was, when could she speak to him again?
And so, time goes on. She begins to utilize social networking to see if she could by chance find him. She also continues to show up at the bookstore every other week on the same day hoping that she would run into him. All the while she is beginning to question her sanity, why is she so determined to find this man? One day, when she least expects it she finds a friend request on her page from him. She giddily accepts the request and sends him a private message right away. She to just wanted him to know how much she enjoyed meeting him and their conversation. In her mind, she thinks that he will never remember all that they had discussed. Has he thought of her the way that she has thought of him? Is he as intrigued as she? Apparently he was because sooner than she could blink, he strikes up a private conversation on her page. They picked up almost exactly where they had left off, going back and forth like teenagers passing notes in class.
And so began a very intense internet connection. Each day was a longer conversation than they had the day before. They learned that they had so much in common. Their lives were very parallel to one another. On the other hand, she felt that she had so much to learn from him. They did come from two very different worlds after all. Sometimes, she felt like a small ignorant child next to this larger than life man. Yet, she never was intimidated by him. After a month of chatting daily via the internet they decided to set up a meeting at the bookstore that they had met in. Both of them wanted a more intimate, face to face talk. Leading up to that moment, she became full of apprehension. How does she talk to him? What would she say? How should she present herself? Self- doubt begins to toy with her mind.
As the evening approaches she begins to worry that he will not show up, that he will change his mind. She shows up at the bookstore full of butterflies and anticipation. She sat in a comfortable armchair and waited, as nervous as a schoolgirl at her first dance. She resisted the temptation to run. After what seemed like an eternity, he walked in the door. He smiled broadly and her heart lurched forward. Odd, she thought. Almost immediately after greeting each other, they fall into a conversation. It was an effortless flow of words. No fear, no worries. The conversation became deeper and more intense. After many hours had passed by, they agreed to part for the evening. As they turn to walk their separate ways, they are drawn into each other’s arms. When they finally break away from each other, the electrical current between them is stronger than any force of nature. At that time, they agree to meet again soon. And so begins a friendship like none other.
She was a very broken soul. A long list of abuse by her own hands and others. He was also a damaged soul, suffering almost the same fate as she had. She had no self-esteem or confidence. He was very aloof. They began to delve deeper into each other’s psyche. Which in turn began to bring out all of the ugliness that they had kept buried for so long. Slowly through these self-discoveries, they begin to trust one another. And on some strange level, a healing process begins for both of them. Maybe they were good for each other. Maybe they can help each other. Maybe this could grow into something bigger, or maybe it could end it all. There were so many maybes.
As they continue their journey of discovery, they still have daily conversations. Although email is good, they decide that maybe they should get together in a more intimate setting. They make a plan and set up a date. The day of their date arrives and she is nervous, although not sure why. She is very excited however to see what will become of the relationship, if you can call it that. As they are dining you could actually feel the tension building between the two of them. Their hands touched and sparks flew. Their passion begins to unfold and it seems as though neither one can wait for dinner to end and for the server to bring the check. As they leave the restaurant they cannot wait to be somewhere private and alone. They arrive at his house after what seemed like an eternity. Both of them had been fighting feelings for so long, it seems as if they will explode. Neither one of them feels that they deserve this happiness. As they begin a sweet journey of exploration, it turns out that this was exactly what they both needed. As time goes on, they become increasingly devoted to one another. Strong emotions are now involved and now real fears come to the surface.
She begins to wonder if she is crazy. He begins to pull away. Time is against them. Life tends to get in the way sometimes and overwhelm you. Slowly she starts to doubt herself, she feels like a self-conscious fool. When she tries talking to him, he is cool as ice. Not showing any emotions or concern for anything. Inside, she begins to crumble and her usual self-loathing comes to the surface once again. He will not divulge any thoughts or emotions to her. And so begins the questioning stage of things between these two damaged souls. It isn’t easy to give up your heart. When the heart is involved and one person shuts down, the effect will be devastating.
Through the quiet times, she begins to feel abandoned and sad. Why won’t he call? Why won’t he talk to me? Did I do something wrong? Oh God, what must he think of me? So, back and forth between pain and sadness she goes. Trying to figure everything out on her own and never actually asking him what was going on. All the while she is trying to will him to talk to her. Well, pushing someone to open up usually results in a door being slammed into your face. So, she conceded. Walks away, deciding to let the pieces fall as they may.
Sometime later, he begins to come back around. He begins to open up slowly. As she patiently waits for him to open up, she realizes that it is not her, it isn’t about her. He has to wrestle with his emotions all on his own. So, she decides to just be there. Be there for him if he needs her, or if he wants to open up fully. Standing in the background, waiting for him she realizes that if it is meant to be, then it will be. All she can do at this point is work on herself and gain inner strength.
More time goes by, he resurfaces again. He also begins to trust in her more. He reveals more of himself to her. In showing his trust for her, she begins to trust him more. Once again that amazing respect that they have always had for one another begins to deepen. She realizes then that this friendship is more valuable than anything else. And if that is all that comes out of it, then that is enough for her.
The relationship today is a beautiful work in progress. It has ups and downs. But for all of the twists involved, it is a wonderful gift. Even if nothing else comes out of it, she now realizes that she is special to him and that is a blessing that she never saw coming.
To be continued……………
And so, time goes on. She begins to utilize social networking to see if she could by chance find him. She also continues to show up at the bookstore every other week on the same day hoping that she would run into him. All the while she is beginning to question her sanity, why is she so determined to find this man? One day, when she least expects it she finds a friend request on her page from him. She giddily accepts the request and sends him a private message right away. She to just wanted him to know how much she enjoyed meeting him and their conversation. In her mind, she thinks that he will never remember all that they had discussed. Has he thought of her the way that she has thought of him? Is he as intrigued as she? Apparently he was because sooner than she could blink, he strikes up a private conversation on her page. They picked up almost exactly where they had left off, going back and forth like teenagers passing notes in class.
And so began a very intense internet connection. Each day was a longer conversation than they had the day before. They learned that they had so much in common. Their lives were very parallel to one another. On the other hand, she felt that she had so much to learn from him. They did come from two very different worlds after all. Sometimes, she felt like a small ignorant child next to this larger than life man. Yet, she never was intimidated by him. After a month of chatting daily via the internet they decided to set up a meeting at the bookstore that they had met in. Both of them wanted a more intimate, face to face talk. Leading up to that moment, she became full of apprehension. How does she talk to him? What would she say? How should she present herself? Self- doubt begins to toy with her mind.
As the evening approaches she begins to worry that he will not show up, that he will change his mind. She shows up at the bookstore full of butterflies and anticipation. She sat in a comfortable armchair and waited, as nervous as a schoolgirl at her first dance. She resisted the temptation to run. After what seemed like an eternity, he walked in the door. He smiled broadly and her heart lurched forward. Odd, she thought. Almost immediately after greeting each other, they fall into a conversation. It was an effortless flow of words. No fear, no worries. The conversation became deeper and more intense. After many hours had passed by, they agreed to part for the evening. As they turn to walk their separate ways, they are drawn into each other’s arms. When they finally break away from each other, the electrical current between them is stronger than any force of nature. At that time, they agree to meet again soon. And so begins a friendship like none other.
She was a very broken soul. A long list of abuse by her own hands and others. He was also a damaged soul, suffering almost the same fate as she had. She had no self-esteem or confidence. He was very aloof. They began to delve deeper into each other’s psyche. Which in turn began to bring out all of the ugliness that they had kept buried for so long. Slowly through these self-discoveries, they begin to trust one another. And on some strange level, a healing process begins for both of them. Maybe they were good for each other. Maybe they can help each other. Maybe this could grow into something bigger, or maybe it could end it all. There were so many maybes.
As they continue their journey of discovery, they still have daily conversations. Although email is good, they decide that maybe they should get together in a more intimate setting. They make a plan and set up a date. The day of their date arrives and she is nervous, although not sure why. She is very excited however to see what will become of the relationship, if you can call it that. As they are dining you could actually feel the tension building between the two of them. Their hands touched and sparks flew. Their passion begins to unfold and it seems as though neither one can wait for dinner to end and for the server to bring the check. As they leave the restaurant they cannot wait to be somewhere private and alone. They arrive at his house after what seemed like an eternity. Both of them had been fighting feelings for so long, it seems as if they will explode. Neither one of them feels that they deserve this happiness. As they begin a sweet journey of exploration, it turns out that this was exactly what they both needed. As time goes on, they become increasingly devoted to one another. Strong emotions are now involved and now real fears come to the surface.
She begins to wonder if she is crazy. He begins to pull away. Time is against them. Life tends to get in the way sometimes and overwhelm you. Slowly she starts to doubt herself, she feels like a self-conscious fool. When she tries talking to him, he is cool as ice. Not showing any emotions or concern for anything. Inside, she begins to crumble and her usual self-loathing comes to the surface once again. He will not divulge any thoughts or emotions to her. And so begins the questioning stage of things between these two damaged souls. It isn’t easy to give up your heart. When the heart is involved and one person shuts down, the effect will be devastating.
Through the quiet times, she begins to feel abandoned and sad. Why won’t he call? Why won’t he talk to me? Did I do something wrong? Oh God, what must he think of me? So, back and forth between pain and sadness she goes. Trying to figure everything out on her own and never actually asking him what was going on. All the while she is trying to will him to talk to her. Well, pushing someone to open up usually results in a door being slammed into your face. So, she conceded. Walks away, deciding to let the pieces fall as they may.
Sometime later, he begins to come back around. He begins to open up slowly. As she patiently waits for him to open up, she realizes that it is not her, it isn’t about her. He has to wrestle with his emotions all on his own. So, she decides to just be there. Be there for him if he needs her, or if he wants to open up fully. Standing in the background, waiting for him she realizes that if it is meant to be, then it will be. All she can do at this point is work on herself and gain inner strength.
More time goes by, he resurfaces again. He also begins to trust in her more. He reveals more of himself to her. In showing his trust for her, she begins to trust him more. Once again that amazing respect that they have always had for one another begins to deepen. She realizes then that this friendship is more valuable than anything else. And if that is all that comes out of it, then that is enough for her.
The relationship today is a beautiful work in progress. It has ups and downs. But for all of the twists involved, it is a wonderful gift. Even if nothing else comes out of it, she now realizes that she is special to him and that is a blessing that she never saw coming.
To be continued……………
Saturday, February 2, 2013
New Drawing and just a thought
By far the most amazing mountain pic yet, trying to expand my abilities. Being creative definately takes work, drive, confidence and discipline. Thanks for all the support that I do have out there. Have a beautiful day everyone!
Friday, January 4, 2013
Untitled #1
Here was my first one of the new year, please let me know your thoughts?
The sky brightens before me
The shining sun brings a new day
A day of promise and peace
A day of smiles and love
Discovering myself...
Embracing happiness
Remembering to indulge in all that the day has to offer
Taking the good and holding it tight
Learning from the bad and changing its flow
As the sun sets on the day I remind myself...
Cherish all that has touched me both good and bad
This is true growth
The sky brightens before me
The shining sun brings a new day
A day of promise and peace
A day of smiles and love
Discovering myself...
Embracing happiness
Remembering to indulge in all that the day has to offer
Taking the good and holding it tight
Learning from the bad and changing its flow
As the sun sets on the day I remind myself...
Cherish all that has touched me both good and bad
This is true growth
Chaos
Here is a new one for the new year! What do you think?
Chaos!
The brain swells with it
Trying to calm it and spread it around...
yet it continues to reach...
Swirling through all of the crevices of my mind
making its way into all of the areas untainted
Chaos...
it grips me
Chaos...
it rules me
Chaos...
it comforts me??
Chaos!
The brain swells with it
Trying to calm it and spread it around...
yet it continues to reach...
Swirling through all of the crevices of my mind
making its way into all of the areas untainted
Chaos...
it grips me
Chaos...
it rules me
Chaos...
it comforts me??
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